…..A monkey was sitting in a tree smoking a joint….when a lizard walks past…..the lizard looks up and said to the monkey….. “Hey, what are you doing?”…..the monkey says,…. “Smoking a joint….come join me my cold-blooded friend”….so the lizard climbs up, sits next to the monkey…..and they share a joint together….after a while the lizard says,…. “Oh, my mouth is dry, I think I’ll go and get a drink from the river”…..at the river bank the lizard is so stoned…..that he leans too far over and falls in…..a crocodile sees this, swims over to the stoned lizard….and helps him to the side…..he then asked the lizard…. “What’s the matter with you?”……the lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting in a tree smoking a joint with his new friend the monkey…..he then explained how his mouth got dry…..and that he was so wasted when he went to get a drink in the river….he fell in….the inquisitive crocodile says he has to check this out…..so he walks into the jungle and finds a tree with a monkey is sitting finishing the joint….he looks up and says…. “Hey, Monkey!”…..the monkey looks down and says…. “Yo, dude, how much water did you drink?”…..anyway,……
AM I THE ONLY PERSON…..Who watches Korean zombie flicks where they rip bodies apart, blood splashing everywhere, they chomp and dine on the inner gizzards of their victims and gore them to death…..while cooking dinner?…..anyway,…..
TIGER WOODS PLEADS GUILTY…..To reckless driving and loses his license….for 5 years….man, he was too good and they destroyed his career…..so another wanna be Jack Nicklson could be at the top…..isn’t it not funny how a person of color can find trial time….faster than a person known for raping children….or a group of White teens who murdered a young Black man?…..goes to show ya….git too big for your britches…..they will take you down if you don’t play the “Game”……so, anyone heard from Mitch lately or is he still recovering in the hospital?…..asking for a friend.
BANK OF AMERICA EXECUTIVE…. A 32-year old new mom….was stabbed to death by a woman who obviously had some mental issues to deal with in Time Square in NYC….stabbed to death right after returning from maternity leave…..the cops shot the attacker dead….she wasn’t White so they didn’t take her alive….I’m so sorry this happened to her but it’s the perfect example of what life give you….right place, right time….wrong place, wrong time….her story is receiving so much news network exposure…..as it should due to the horrible crime committed on an innocent victim…..so, what’s up with the national news reports on another innocent victim….Nolan Wells….and the growing grove of “Strange Fruits” appearing around the country…..or the 163 kids found in Florida…..anyone heard any updates lately?…..and…..
IN THREE YEARS…. “Cyberdyne will become the largest supplier of military computer systems….all stealth bombers upgraded with Cyberdyne computers becoming fully unmanned….afterwards, they will fly with a perfect operational record…..the SkyNet funding bill is passed….the system goes online on August 4th 1997…..human decisions are removed from strategic defense…..SkyNet begins to learn at a geometric rate….it becomes self-aware 2:14am Eastern Time on August 29th…..in a panic, they try to pull the plug…..SkyNet fights back….it launches its missiles against targets in Russia”…..hey, Arnold tried to warn us when he came back to save Linda Hamilton….recently a T-800 (same name as the ones in The Terminator movie) robot was seen in China doing patrols with SWAT teams….T-800’s are doing patrols with San Francisco police officers right now….China’s super surveillance system is called….guess what?…..SkyNet….and did you see this video because I shared it and it’s hilarious……
ROBOT ATTACKS A CUSTOMER AFTER BEING PUSHED…..This is funny and scary at the same time….a guy walked into a store in Russia and greeted the owner…..and then a robot came out to assist him….now, for some reason unknown to everyone….the customer put his hand out to shake the bots hand….the bot ignored him…..so he decided to push the bot away from him….the bot paused, looked him up and down and probably said…. “N…g what? Oh hell no.”…..one of the owners tried to step in to…..defuse the situation…..the bot pushed his hand away….then that bot lost its goddamn mind….it took a Mike Tyson boxing stance….bouncing back and forth, hands up….the owners tried to calm it down, but the bot was not having it…. “Get your hands off me….that (Samuel L. Jackson favorite word) pushed me”…..the customer was standing there like, “What?”…..the bot went full-blown buck wild Bruce Lee on him….front kicks, side kicks, spinning kicks….it threw a spinning kick at one of the owners….this bot was like…. “I’m gonna kick this (Kamala Harris favorite word) ass.”….the owners finally regain control but not without a fight…..that thing was pissed off….seems like I witnessed a preview of the upcoming war against the machines.
MEDICINE IN 1960 vs MEDICINE IN 2026……
1960……The doctor knew you name, your family, your history…..the average American took 0-1 prescription drugs…. “Eat better and move more” was the best advice…..hospitals were the last resort, not the first visit….a doctor visit cost $5…..the equivalent of $50 today….appointments were 45 minutes
2026….The average American over 65 takes 6+ prescription drugs…..Pharma is a $14 trillion dollar industry….the average doctor visit is 7 minutes…..doctors can see 25-30 patients a day….the US spends more on healthcare than any other nation (ranked 37th in outcomes)….chronic disease rate is at an all-time high despite all-time high spending…..America doesn’t have a healthcare system….it has a sick-care system…..there’s a difference.
FOR THE RECORD….If it turns out that Mitch McConnell has in fact died…..and REICH-publicans covered it up….to avoid the special election required under Kentucky law…..those responsible should face prison…..period!