…..While I was sitting in the kitchen…..just finished a bowl before the guy comes and repair our hall window……my brain asked me…..how did “Rub a dub, dub…..three men in a tub”…..become a nursery rhyme?
MY NEW FAVORITE CRAZY PERSON….Marjorie Taylor Greene said this….. “You know that I don’t know what the hell happened to the Republican Party….I really don’t…..but I’ll tell you one thing….the course that it’s on…..I don’t want to have anything to do with it…..and I don’t care anymore”…..my sister Gwen said this….. “We don’t need your apathy….we need you to convince the other deluded people in your State….to see the light….you owe the U.S.”…..and now you don’t care anymore?…..(I want to say the “B” word so bad)…..you didn’t care when Obama was in office…..you didn’t care when Biden was in office….and now you care about what’s going on in the country….when you’ve been part of the reason….why this madness is happening within the country?…..did you suddenly grow a pair…..or is it because “STUPID” is ignoring you and kicked you to the curb?….if you really don’t care anymore…..then resign and do the country a favor…..girlfriend, you can kiss America’s collective…..(I really want to say the “A” word).
THE OKTOBERFEST…..Is finally over and the citizens of Munich, Germany are damn happy it is…..the world’s largest and annual drunk fest…..where people come from all around the globe to….get shit-faced, hopefully get laid behind a tent by a stranger…..puke, piss, poop and pass out drunk behind a beer tent…..when I first moved over and attended my first Oktoberfest…..I loved it….never seen anything like it….after my fourth trip…..I’d had enough….it wasn’t the event itself…..it was all the people from around the globe……who decided getting drunk in Munich was a good idea…..a lot of people living in the city rent out their apartments at exuberant prices….and leave the city for 2 and a half weeks…..and this year the fest was totally crazy…..it’s the first time I can ever remember the fest being closed…..because of too many people…..more than 1.5 million people attending almost every day…..now if you’ve seen the Wiesn (that’s what they call the area its held on)…..before the tents, rides and other stuff is built…..you’ll notice it’s bigger than 8-10 football fields lined up next to each other…..maybe more and they probably only use the length of 6 fields….if they used the entire space available on the Wiesn…..I’ve been in some cities that aren’t that big…..lots of people…..inside and outside the beer tents…..trust me, it can become a psychological nightmare……
NOW….Like I said before, I visited a few times…..the first one was in 1987…..when a Maß of beer….that would be one liter of piss….cost 3.50 DM…….that was the German currency before the Euro took over and messed everything up….about 5 U.S. bucks….and like 5-7-10 of us would take over a table….order food and a bunch of other stuff…..get totally wasted….dance on the table….sing words to a song….you don’t even know and heard for the first time….and didn’t care because you were drunk AF…..and having a great time….and definitely doing 3 out of the 4 “P’s”……piss, puke and poop…..and we never let anyone pass out…..in the end, when we tallied up how much cash we forked over…..let’s say 8 friends…..whatever we had was way less than 200 DM…..that between eight people…..that’s cheap….and you basically visited the fest whenever some suggested it…..let’s fast forward to….
2025……You have to admit…..after COVID…..shit changed…..and it cost more to survive now days….the prices went up…..like way up…..I don’t do the fest anymore……I took Nicole one time…her response…. “Ah, ok”….so no, we don’t do the fest anymore……because it’s ridiculous to go…..unless you’re never attended one….ok, then go…see it….get drunk….maybe you’ll get lucky….and wake up to someone who’s name you don’t remember….or piss your pants….and after that…never return….now, the prices are insane….I mean mentally insane…..take your same 8 friends again…..oh wait, I forgot to tell you something…..it’s not about y’all thinking you can just stroll into a tent, get a table and start partying….no….you have to be at the gate/door/arch by at least….10 am…..and when it opens at 11….you and you’re friends better run like hell to get in a tent and claim a table…..otherwise, by 11.30….you’re shit out of luck unless you or your company reserved something…..and guess what?…..you can’t leave because if you do….you’ll never get back in….unless you do the other “P”….pass out behind the tent…..wake up, go back in and do it all over again…..anyway, let’s order some stuff….let’s see…..Tomahawk Steak…..179€…..Currywurst Vegan (a non-meat sausage)….. 20€…….Half Schweinhaxe (that’s a big ham hock-good when the skin is crispy)…..25€…..Kaiserschmarn (this is so good)….22.50€…..Half Brathendl (half a chicken)….20.50€……1 Maß beer….15.80€…..1Liter Spezi (that’s Coke and Fanta together)…..12.48€……Bratwurst (a very big sausage)…..15.10€…..Half Ente (that would be half of Donald Duck)….40€….and just in case for some obscure reason…..you feel you need 1 Liter of Water….10.95€…..yes, for H2O…..now remember, you and your friends are there for the entire day……while outside….over one million people are waiting outside for you to leave….so they will have a chance to enter a tent…..do exactly what you’ve done all day….get wasted and party with hundreds of drunk people…..I don’t know how it is now but back in the day….I’d hang in the Hofbräu Tent…..because people would fight in that one….I once saw some U.S. Marines, minding their own business….takeout like a platoon of people because they wouldn’t leave them alone….anyway,…..now, you’re at a point where you know you need to figure out how to correctly stand….without gravity getting in your business…..look for familiar faces through blurred eyes…..and find the exit……after being there all day, drinking, eating while contemplating the 4 “P’s”…..plus, there was the “paying for everything”…..when it’s brought to your table….you pay right then and there…..ain’t no running a tab…..too many people for them to remember and usually…..you’ll stroll over to another table…..and start singing more drunk songs in a language you don’t understand….and they don’t care…..because he’s from England and doesn’t understand a damn thing either……and in the end…..you’ve spent…..
A LOT OF MONEY!…..Those who do go on a regular basis….and know when you go to the Fest…..you “Go to the Fest”……you’re going to eat and drink and have a great time…..but those prices…..between 8 people…..or even one person….are insane…..40€ for half of Donald?