WAIT!……before I bore you any further…..Aboriginal…..look at that word….and then think about the people…..man, they have been on this planet for a long minute……you have Italian, French, English, American……Nordic, African…..and many more…..my point is…..out of all those names….. “NOT ONE OF THEM”…..has the word….. “ORIGINAL”……in it!…..you wanna learn something?……next time you’re Down Under…..say hello to an Aboriginal person……and receive a serious history lesson……anyway, moving on…..
THE AWKWARD MOMENT….when you’re not sure if you actually have free time…..or you’re just forgetting everything
WOMEN….and cats will do as they please…..and men and dogs…..should relax…..and get used to the idea
AIR FRYERS…..are just Easy Bake Ovens……for adults
IF I TALK TO YOU…..while I’m driving…..I genuinely like you…..because that’s supposed to be my music time
SELF CARE…..is also not arguing with people…..who are committed…..to misunderstanding you
GRAPES MUST BE CRUSHED…..to make wine…..diamonds form under pressure….olives are pressed to release oil….seeds grow in darkness….so whenever you feel crushed…..under pressure….pressed….or in darkness….you’re in a powerful place of transformation….trust the process
THERE ARE SOME ROADS….I wish I never even went down….but you live…..and learn
I’M IN NEED…..of a good night with a bonfire…..good music….great friends….and a million stars
IT BLOWS MY MIND…..that NASA is able to receive data……from 6.28 billion miles away…..but I lose my WiFi signal in my bathroom
WE ARE NOT…..human beings having a spiritual experience…..we are spiritual beings…..having a human experience
SOME DAYS….I feel like running away….then I remember how much I hate running
I THINK…..therefore I don’t have much in common…..with a lot of people
I LAUGH STUFF OFF…..because prison….doesn’t serve tequila
MOTHER. But how will I explain drag to my children?
TEACHER: Your children practice hiding from an active shooter at school on a daily basis….they can handle learning that adults play dress up
THE PILOT: Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen…..first off….I have some good news….you guys get to be…..on TV tonight
MOMMA HEN:…..It’s called egg nog?…..it’s delicious…..did the kids help you make it?
POPPA HEN; Couldn’t have done it without them
LOOK,….I simply do not have the energy….to pretend that I like you today
THERE ARE VARIOUS WAYS…..that alien civilization might act…..with one of the potential outcomes being…..that they are more peaceful and harmonious…..than humans
I PRESONALLY THINK…..Cinderella should have lived happy ever after…..with all her animal friends…..rather than settle for a man who had her try on a shoe……because he didn’t recognize her…..without makeup
WHEN MEN….refer to themselves as “alpha males”….I hear that in the context of software…..where alpha versions are unstable…..missing important features…..filled with flaws….and not fit for the public
PEOPLE….don’t leave Christianity because they stop believing in the teaching of Jesus…..people leave Christianity because they believe in the teachings of Jesus so much…..they can’t stomach being part of an institution…..that claims to be about that….and clearly isn’t
AND MY FAVORITE……
EVERYONE…..told Sam not to sing……but Samsung anyway……(Yeah, I know….I’m going to Hell…..and I’ll see you later……yeah, you!)