Gamer pleads guilty to making emergency call to report Grand Theft Auto shooting
There is a melted snowman on eBay for sale
Dad goes out on Christmas booze-up with pals and wakes up – in France
Footballer sent off for warning of dog shit on pitch in Christian league where swearing is banned
Boobie Bags and tampon wrappers offer a cheap way to smuggle alcohol into a party
Feuding Gran convicted of criminal damage for spraying weed killer on sister’s prize winning Artichokes
Girl age 3 takes perfect selfie on mom’s phone – after 667 attempts
Porn star Lisa Ann gives up adult film industry for career in fantasy football
Priest installs mobile phone jamming device to stop people from talking during funerals
Man accused of swallowing 9 thousand Pound diamond in jewelry heist is followed to the toilet by the police
Pensioners told to take condoms on cruises by the Government
Mother told to hand over Nutella to airport staff because it posed terror risk
Santa left red faced as his trousers fall down in front of mothers and children
Detroit man dressed as Santa shot two in defense of Mrs. Claus
German police hunt stolen pigeon worth $184,000
Right Wing candidate: I know gays like animals sex because a “homosexual donkey” tried to rape my horse
Indiana county jail gets a bomb threat a day after the bomb was supposed to go off
BBC reporter too stoned to finish report on burning opiates
Astronaut needed wrench so NASA emailed him one
Seven teenage girls get pregnant on school trip
A mother still breastfeeds her three-year-old triplets
Prisoners stage a jailbreak after throwing chili powder in the faces of the police
Police call for back up after sending officer with a fear of cows to make farmyard arrest
Chicago is putting subway rats on birth control
Man kidnaps ex-fiancée to win her back
Woman said God told her to throw raw meat at the cops
Police officer’s helmet cam records joint rolling car passenger
A mother was arrested after she was found allegedly getting high on aerosol spray at Walmart while her son waited outside
Text message about drug deal sent to off-duty officer
Thieves steal drone but forget the remote
Florida man arrested on Christmas Eve after taking crack cocaine into the Intensive Care Unit to share with a friend
Germaphobe slugs elderly man who sneezed near him
Chicago O’Hare International Airport is named after Al Capone’s lawyer’s son
A collision between two women using walkers resulted in a felony charge
Woman gets impatient waiting for a slow-moving train to pass, so she decides to crawl under it while it’s moving
Iowa woman faces 30 days in jail after sending a box of cow poop to her neighbors because she was upset they kept complaining about her barking dog
Public intoxication defendant appears in court with whiskey bottle
Man stole own car from Camden County impound lot
Peachtree City police chief questioned in wife’s shooting – says he accidentally shot her twice
Group files lawsuit against Kansas for teaching science in science class
World’s top publisher regrets erasing Israel from atlas meant for Middle East customers
Massachusetts bill could ban sex during divorce
NY couple complained about a neighbor so much they were arrested
India to track toilet use with tablets
John Hopkins gives woman quadruple amputation after mistaken diagnosis
Judge accepts a pair of Nikes for bail instead of cash
Naked man took cat nap on store’s dog beds
Dairy cows blew the roof off their barn
Mother of 11 who lives on welfare may be pregnant again
Teenager wakes up during brain surgery and asks doctors for progress report
Owner spends $426 dollars on life-saving surgery for constipated goldfish
Father calls police to supervise him spanking his daughter
Woman posed as lawyer, negotiated plea deals for clients
Casey Molter trashes “Psychic” girlfriend’s car after Granny sex dream prediction
Oklahoma lawmakers propose ban on wearing hoodies in public
Couple receives Government benefits because they are too fat to work
Councilman threatens to sue newspaper if they use his name without his permission
Florida man fatally shoots friend because he didn’t think loaded assault weapon would really work
Man tells police: I was just airing out my penis
Firefighters rescue naked woman stuck in ex-boyfriend’s chimney
Nursery staff and child minders are given duty to report toddlers they may suspect of being at risk of becoming terrorists under new Home Office measures
Woman accused of attacking her mother with a stapler
Japanese-born politician tells Czechs to walk pigs near mosques
Man arrested for hitting his girlfriend with a steak
Pair spends two days in locked (unlocked) closet
Nice burglar fixes window screen, returns money
Cyclist’s bike stolen at police station while reporting iPhone theft
Arizona police pay man’s meal tab at IHOP, then arrest him for murder
Japanese man pays $37,500 for a single tuna
Man arrested for fighting with officers who wouldn’t let him save his dog from burning house
Adult store security guard stops alleged robber with machete
“I Have Drugs” T-shirt worn by marijuana and meth suspect
Robots can learn how to cook just like you do by watching You Tube videos
Septic tank explodes, douses shops and bystanders
Philippines police forced to wear adult diapers during Papal visit
Frenchman dies after downing 56 shots
Florida man stuffs chainsaw up his shirt, tries to bicycle away
Cowboy fan destroys his own house after his team loses to the Redskins
Anti-violence activists charged in vicious attack
Woman arrested for DUI in jail parking lot
Dell Schanze charged for allegedly chasing an owl in a paraglider
Dentist offers to buy back Halloween candy from trick-or-treaters
School pupils given English homework about wife chopping off husband’s penis
Swearing Barbie Doll shocks mom after blurting out “What the F…”
World garlic eating champion munches his way through 33 raw cloves in just aminute
Dumped woman spends a week in KFC to get over ex
Woman sets boyfriend on fire using nail polish
NYC Board of Elections: 850 people officially over 164 years old
Man who had sex with over 700 cars reveals first loving experience with a Volkswagen Beetle
Impotent man who inserted steel rod into penis almost dies after it shoots backwards into his bladder
Woman gets song, “How Much is that Doggie in the Window” stuck in her head for four years
Woman gets fed up with being single – and marries herself
School bans students from wearing leggings, yoga pants and skinny jeans to stop teachers from being distracted
Toddler gets toilet seat stuck on her head after potty training foul-up (uh dad, it’s the other end ok?)
Meet the online goat who will take away all of your sins
Concerned Chinese Officials search 10,000 pigeon butts for bombs
Man texted his probation officer looking for weed
Football coach fired because parents claims eating watermelon is racist
Anti-gun Missouri state senator arrested with a gun and drunk
Drunken trombone playing clown fires gun from garage
Chinese student died of a heart attack as he looked at sexy magazine at sperm bank
Woman reunites with long-lost mom, learns she married her brother
Whiskey saves man’s eyesight after being blinded by vodka
Florida gun range lets customers shoot each other
50 elephants go on a drunken rampage in India
Voters re-elect circuit county judge previously deemed “legally insane”
Dying manager fired for staying alive
Arizona bans premarital menstruation
Man suffers heart attack at Heart Attack Grill
Judge rules a black church the rightful owner of a KKK store
Widespread hangovers reported in North Pole after Elf spikes eggnog
Columbus man plans wife’s funeral while Postal Service searches for lost remains
Man goes to vote and told he’s dead
Maryland school board eliminates references to all religious holidays to avoid recognizing Muslim holiday
Corn maze visitors get hopelessly lost, call 911
Man call 911 because his wife wouldn’t give him the remote
Gun pointed during argument over Battleship game
Man maced by woman in movie theatre after he asked her to turn off her phone
Burglar knocks hole in the wall of St. Louis Credit Union, gets nothing
Jehovah’s Witness Leader: Don’t wear tight pants, Homosexuals designed them
Man buys 99 iPhone to propose to girlfriend….she says no
Woman fatally stabs ex-boyfriend because he put a curse on her
Tractor-trailer stuck in park, driver blames GPS
Texas high school team with 0-10 record makes playoffs
Florida man robs pizza man, comes forward as a witness and blames his cousin
California newspaper ask reporters to help with deliveries
Doctor pulls hundreds of maggots from patient’s ear
Test referring to “Big Bootie” pulled from school
Armed robbers leave store without money
2 German girls blew themselves up after using too much deodorant in their car
Former baseball player’s finger falls off while playing poker
World’s worst deadbeat dad now has 26 kids
The world’s biggest chocolate maker says we’re running out of chocolate
11-year-old girl battling insurance company over rare illness that causes breast to grow rapidly; was a size 50f by age 10
Back from the dead woman complains about having a cold
German village plays prank on Neo-Nazis by getting them to march to raise money for Neo-Nazis who are ready to leave the group
Seals accused of sexually attacking Penguins
St. Louis woman sentenced to 78 years in prison for water boarding her children
Florida bra-wearing man allegedly blocked customers from ATM
Cornhusker fan attempts to jump over moving car (just in case you’re wondering how that turned out…Taxi-1…..stupid college kid-banged-up!)
Woman sues owners of dog killed by her pit bulls for $1 million
Ex-con bites off man’s ear during bowling alley brawl
Elephant tramples Thai handler, runs off with tourist on its back
Woman steals sister’s fiancé – later buries him alive so she can be with her new lover
Man threatens to kill staff at Tesco – while branding a photo of a gun
At UC-Davis campus, students can’t register until they concede it’s wrong to say “I’d hit that”
Father turns 11-year old daughter into a drug mule
Man locks himself out of his apartment – ties rope around his waist and tries to rappel down to his balcony (he finally figured out – calling a locksmith was a better idea)
Hampton couple terrorized by aggressive groundhog
Students suspended for 10 days after snorting Smarties
Fire alarm triggered by marijuana smoke forces evacuation of 100 students at Princeton University
Conn. babysitter has sex with friend’s 10 year old son: boys mother became suspicious due to a hickey on his neck
Woman arrested for attempting to mail drugs to an inmate
Cop busted for exposing himself to male drivers
Arkansas felon arrested for selling gun on Facebook to a police officer
American questioned for shipping body parts
Dutch adventurer plans to drive to the South Pole in a tractor
AND OFF TO THE WORLD OF THE STUPID…..
Phuc Kieu suspected of sexual battery (can you imagine going through life with the name….Phuc Kieu?)
Man tries to rob a mall’s kiddie train ride
Texas approves disputed history textbook for school, among other things, it says Moses was a founding father
Animal rights activists host a funeral for a frozen chicken in a grocery store
Cop gets 1 day suspension for vulgar language while punching a woman
Woman locks cat in a cage and puts it in the bathtub because it ate her pizza
Woman willingly poses for a picture holding stolen credit card
Pregnant man charged with stalking estranged wife
Halle Berry takes ex to court again, claims he’s trying to make their daughter white
Turkish President: “Feminists don’t accept motherhood and women not equal to men”
Restaurants in Saudi Arabia are banning women, “Women not allowed” signs going up
350-pound thief on motorized scooter caught sitting on stolen steaks
Woman punches baby in the face at a restaurant because she thought it was a doll
Man charged with putting a camera in ex’s shower says he was filming chickens
Woman arrested for $6,400 sausage heist
Barber uses a lighter to cut a man’s hair
Facebook blocks water-birth photo but Kim Kardashian’s butt is ok
Man blows himself up after family feud
Groom discovers wife is actually a 15-year old boy
Woman stripped naked and paraded around on a donkey
Farmer turned his car into a sheep dog
Woman offered compensation after being run over by her own dog
Rosie Skinner eats 2 large sponges a week
Snowball fight ended with a stabbing
Man jailed for five months for “mooning” at CCTV camera
White man has sex with toy horse in Walmart
Armed black residents stand guard outside white-owned business during Ferguson riots
US Air Force F-89 jet fighter interceptor disappeared chasing a UFO
Woman booted from US Airways flight – her pig on a leash was stinking up the cabin
Man who blamed his dog for him speeding is jailed
Man fled crash to avoid yelling girlfriend
DUI suspect allegedly drinks vodka while being questioned by cops
Gay Russians are increasingly seeking asylum in the United States
Drunk Chinese man falls into container full of raw sewage on shortcut home from bar
Oklahoma woman says she’s a witch and needs her Meth
DHS Agents raid a lingerie shop and saves America from unlicensed underwear
Mutant goat born with a human face – farmers are accused of bestiality
“An airplane shit on us” – woman claims human feces dropped from an airplane spoiled her house
Kazakhstan says SpongeBob SquarePants is a violent bully who corrupts children’s minds
Two teachers pass out after drinking binge while on school trip to Germany
Florida man shoots 400 pound bear breaking into his house
Woman mistakes boat ramp for road, drives into the harbor
Woman smashes brand new $50,000 Porsche seconds after leaving the showroom
Student tries to blackmail ex-girlfriend: “Pay $700 and clean my apartment or I’ll release the sex tape”
Meet 36-year old mother who treats 300 lifelike dolls as if they’re her own
Peeping Tom teen claimed shower film was to check if his phone was waterproof
Man drinks quart of Soy Sauce, goes into a coma
Man post plan to hire a hit-man to kill his wife via his Facebook page
Burglar snort man’s ashes, thought it was cocaine
Florida man gets lost, calls 911, get arrested with stolen property….which included a GPS
Guy with mask tries to rob the Radio Shack he works at, ends up tasing himself, returns later to work his shift and gets arrested
Man tells deputy he’s got a warrant out and asks if he’s going to be arrested
Man caught downloading child porn on his phone while being interviewed by the police
Bag of teeth links man to Seattle area dental burglaries
Thief dials 911 when his stolen truck runs out of gas
“Dorothy” wearable device lets you escape blind dates by clicking your heels
Zombie attempting to scare motorist was run over by a car
Man arrested tells cops he’s Denzel Washington
Court tells United Kingdom man: Nudity is not a human right
Policeman who asked to smell woman’s feet arrested
Naked man streaking through a neighborhood lands in the hospital after falling off a cliff
Student accidentally sets college on fire during fireworks proposal
Maine woman dressed in Hello Kitty costume arrested for drunk driving
Professor suspended from top university for giving off “negative vibes”
Friends dare each other to lick electric fly swatter
The City Council passed two bills last week to ensure New York remains a sanctuary for illegal aliens – even if they’re violent, convicted felons, known gang members or on the terrorist watch list
Man smashes Ten Commandments statue, blames Satan
Man tries to steal a TV from Walmart to watch Dukes of Hazzard
Woman armed only with her breast allegedly squirted milk at pharmacy workers and made off with $127 dollars
Bestiality porn charges dropped after tiger found to be a guy in a tiger suit
TSA finds a cannon barrel in Maui’s traveler’s luggage
30 teenagers escape detention center-several returned to detention by their families
30 percent of Americans get news from Facebook
White House to host fasting Indian leader for dinner
Woman dies after taking off her clothes at a meat market
Mom beat neighbor busted for child porn
Police say robbers donned thongs on their faces
Cops and robbers raid the same house
German parents post baby on Ebay for 1 Euro
13-year old steals dad’s credit card to buy hooker
Grave diggers use skull as marijuana bong
Naked stranger on toilet asks to “Finish Business” before arrest
Pastor turns gas into pineapple juice – let’s congregation drink it
Cobb County woman arrested for allegedly fake $94 million dollar tax return
Man arrested with crack-cocaine stuck in dentures
Man fires gun into neighbor’s house because it is the only way he knows how to unload it
Disabled mortuary student denied parking space because she drives a hearse
CCTV operator jailed for voyeurism
Louisiana church fears gay wedding ceremonies so it boots out AA meetings just to be safe
Australian man fined for buckling in beer, not child (he put the seat belt around his case of beer – and made his 5-year old sit on the floor)
Inmate says escape was an accident
Police called to look into Postman’s shorts
Disgruntled Chef challenged boss to meat cleaver duel
Carjacker stops to ask TV news crew for directions
Florida student arrested for punching teacher over crayons
Bank robber gives Teller her name and address
Naked man urinates on himself, does yoga and starts dancing in the parking lot
European Union flag stirs confused terrorist alert in Belfast, Ireland
Ferry skipper spanked his wife with a deck shoe
Mass tug-of-war contest severs the arms of two men
Fake crack sold to Nursing home residents
Woman attacks her husband with soap
China body searched 10,000 pigeons
Spanish police nab a burglar playing dead at funeral home
Man robs store where he frequents business
Grandmother forces criminals to sweep her house
Holdup suspect nabbed after ending up at the same bar as his pursuers
Juror discharged after smoking pot at court house
Driver blames speeding on poorly dunked Oreo cookie
“Look Into My Eyes” – Supermarket robber hypnotizes checkout girls (only in Italy)
Woman uses huge teddy bear as a passenger in carpool lane
Noises in tourist’s head were from flesh-eating maggots (Chris Tucker “DAAAAMMN” please)
People agree to give away firstborns for free WiFi
Mom accused of helping her son in a drive-by shooting
Woman says she feels completely free when acting like a horse
Florida city to provide one-way bus tickets for homeless people
Man dials 911 for wake-up call (he didn’t want to miss his court date)
Waukegan man reports his pornography collection stolen
Woman brings a grenade into Police Station
Woman sat on boyfriend’s toilet for two-years
Man skipped his robbery trail to hold up a money store
Mary Ann from Gilligan’s Island busted for pot in Idaho
Elvis shows up at a Kentucky court drunk
Woman jailed for worshipping teapot
Hairstylist accused of shooting a client who was angry over cut
Coast Guard rescues man attempting to “RUN” to Bermuda in inflatable hydro-bubble
Teacher’s plastic sword on “Talk Like a Pirate Day” caused four-school lockdown
Mugging outside of a Ninja school goes bad
Recycling thief caught despite wearing a mask because he put it on in front of a security camera
Man in wheelchair asked to be wheeled out of Kmart with stolen TV
State High Court spares life of a dog that bit a man
Viagra may cause vision problems
Cannibals jailed for eating dinner party friend
Mississippi mom busted breaking into cars, claims she was hunting ISIS
Cops arrest woman after drugs fall out of her prosthetic butt
Man gets stuck in dumpster after searching for wife’s lost dentures
Man kills friend for “Poking” his girlfriend on Facebook
Woman who weighs 600 pounds says, “I only want to get fatter”
Woman uses potato as a contraceptive (in case you’re wondering – that didn’t go too well)
Same man tried to rob the same bank wearing the same clothes
Worker steals store deposit, spends it all on Bingo
Man wears stolen jacket to police interview
Police say NY woman stabbed a man with kitchen knife for calling her ugly
Customer slaps Kentucky Fried Chicken employee, employee retaliates by dousing customer with hot oil
College administration spent hundreds of thousands in donated money on parties and booze (don’t be so surprised – its college)
Researchers working on a safer birth control for larger women
Drunken stripper attacked boyfriend with an ax (just because he wouldn’t talk to her)
Couple had sex in the rear seat of a police cruiser
Kids get a taste of farm life by renting chickens
Woman arrested in car fire suggests boyfriend go and get marshmallows
Burglar demands ransom, forgets details
Woman upset over sirens chases Paramedics with a rolling pin
Man blames car wreck on prehistoric winged reptile
Woman was accused of wiping her nose on police officer’s shirt
Police did not buy a tar-smeared man’s story that he was visiting family on the roof of a convenience store at 3am
Daycare staff charged with running toddler fight club
Republican candidate is convinced his opponent is dead and using a body double
California school punishes kids for using the bathroom more than twice a year
Woman accidentally shoots herself during shooting competition
Guy transforms apartment into an arcade, Fiancé promptly dumps him
Colorado teen’s music was so loud, he didn’t hear the incoming tornado
Man hit by subway after peeing on train tracks
Judge falls asleep during murder trial
Immigrant to be thrown out of Germany for being overqualified
Niceville Police officers were called to a residence after a man allegedly decided he wanted to sing and dance outside.
A fist fight happened between Great Grandmothers in hospital maternity ward
5-year old told to sign “Suicide Contract” at school
Gun stolen from restroom after being left behind by an off-duty cop
Woman who cut in line for restroom is hit with a brick by a tourist
Elvis died alone in his Graceland bathroom
Ex-funeral director faces 278 charges for stashing bodies
Dwarf stripper got bride-to-be pregnant at her bachelorette party
Army officer tried to smuggle a tank
Woman escapes jail for swearing at a toilet
Priest sentenced to Religion
Naked man sent to wrong house for sex
Iowa cop tries to search car because “Everybody that plays Frisbee golf smokes weed” (good thing I didn’t play Frisbee golf)
California police field reports of creepy clowns
Wife breaks into jail for sex
Sheriff accused of charging inmates room and board
Man drank hairspray in store and was busted for shoplifting
California Parrot with British accent vanished four years ago, returns speaking Spanish
Police tell the wrong parents their son died
An elderly couple returned from holiday to find a “Goldilocks” burglar asleep in their bed, a whiff of perfume in the air, the bath full of bubbles and the intruder’s underwear hanging out to dry
Drug dealer hides in his own basement for 17-years – sent to prison on Friday
Motorist not sober enough to face drunk driving charges
Thief panics when hotel tourists wake up during robbery (he told them, “You can beat me up if you don’t call the cops)
City spends months debating smoking ban in public parks, discovers smoking was already banned in public parks
Disgruntled employee steals a train
Homeless man uses church phone to call sex line
Suspect: “I didn’t rob anyone, I was just smoking marijuana.”
Chicago man joins marathon runners to escape the police
Florida man with “Misunderstood” tattooed across his forehead mugs and beats up beachgoers, get identified with “Misunderstood” tattooed across his forehead
Iowa man takes nude photos of 6-year-old girl with 35mm camera, takes roll to pharmacy to get developed
Granny was stuck in toilet hole for four hours after trying to retrieve false teeth
Dallas Cowboy running back Joseph Randle arrested for shoplifting underwear
Man arrested for aggressively moping woman’s shoes
New Hampshire state Rep. called Congresswoman ugly as sin
Teenagers arrested after they paintball a police car)
Man arrested for eating jellybeans in a store
Bus driver blames students for her failed drug test
Accused opened his door for the Police “half naked and holding a joint”
Couple make burglar clean up at gunpoint
Burglars stole candy from a baby
Passenger wears a Hazmat suit to Dulles Airport
Floridian 19, arrested for lewd act with stuffed animals inside a Walmart store
Missouri couple’s $680,000 Florida beach house built on the wrong lot
New York makes yogurt official state snack
DWI suspect bribes cops with Mountain Dew
Meet Garfi, the angriest cat on the Internet (you should see this cat – he really looks pissed)
Man wearing handcuffs as a fashion statement near a Courthouse and was questioned
Drunken Priest punches a cop
Dentist claims breast rubs are appropriate
Woman yelled, “Eat my pork chop – feel my fork” as she stabbed her partner who ate her chop
Toilet paper thief on the loose in Wisconsin
Handcuffed kids steal U.S. border agent’s car
Escaped convict found at police party
Test reveal dog is allergic to humans
Man sues after waking up from colonoscopy in pink panties
Man 52, arrested for battering a woman with a burrito
Parents may be liable for what their children post on Facebook
1 in 10 people think HTML is a sexually transmitted disease
Enraged camel attacks, kills Chicago man
Burglars leave goat curled up on a bed (?)
Drunk driver tries to out run police….on a tractor
Men break into building full of police
Muggers pick on blind Judo champ
Karate school robbery leaves thief hospitalized
Louie Gohmert: Nurses infected with Ebola are part of the Democrats war on women
Man arrested for throwing dildos at teenage girls
Obese woman says she is fat because of the Government
Bloodied suspect on the run from police stops at Starbucks, orders Vanilla Frappuccino, hide in the bathroom for half an hour
Woman scratches boyfriend badly in fight over bed covers
Family shocked to receive text messages from their dead grandmother buried with her mobile phone three years later
6 foot 3 inch trainer got free steroids by using Medicare and claiming he was a Dwarf
Girlfriend makes man walk the plank
Man caught in stolen truck told police he was tired of walking
Police need a hand to find stolen limbs
A driver was holding a beer arrested driving a car with only three tires
Man arrested for having big muscles
Mentally ill man brings hatchet into high school, says “It seemed like a good idea”
Mom abandoned her kids to sell sex in a chicken coop
Mashed potatoes sparked a riot at a Kansas jail
Delta flight lands at a military based instead of the airport by mistake
Woman nearly loses her eyesight after going thru “Punch Therapy”
Woman dies from maggot infested weave
Pokémon enthusiast stabbed, turns down medical treatment to keep playing
The last prince of Italy is selling pasta from a food truck in California
Man pays $11,000 for a bunch of grapes
Girl feels no pain as thousands of ants live inside her head
Spirit detains a burglar for 3 days inside a home
Wanted man caught while playing Pokémon Go outside a police station
Burglary suspect allegedly used human brains to get high
Woman steals 13-year-old’s bike to catch more Pokémon
Dead woman defies Pastor’s order to “Get Up.”
Man poops his own pants to stop police from arresting him
Husband of The Year fails to notice his bride’s fall from the back of the scooter
German landlady bricks up elderly couple’s front door after a fight about the rent
Man stole money from cars to support his pizza habit.
Britons warned to stay alert as erratic seagulls tripping on acid are smashing into buildings and cars
Video captures a man accused of building a chemical bomb inside WalMart
Couple arrested after riding nude on a lawn mower
Minister charged with burglary of another church
Elderly British woman fends off burglar with bacon
Woman drove for days in Alaska with her husband in a casket
Canadian teens detained for Pokémon Go border crossing
Pennsylvania police seeking owner of unclaimed pot
Strong smell of cooked urine prompts apartment evacuation
Old lobster is spared the pot and will retire to Maine Aquarium
Man lassoes bear with its head stuck in a big plastic container
Woman suffers 3rd degree burns from pennies left in her hot SUV
Sydney flight diverted after drunk passengers start throwing punches (Love me some Aussies!)
Lap dance proceeds will go to support West Virginia flood relief
Russian gas station offers free tank of gas to people in swimsuits and high heels
Ten-year-old Indian boy addicted to dog milk
Vanilla Ice has a public meltdown at the airport
Parents accused of leaving their 2-year-old alone so they could play Pokémon Go
Experts to Rio athletes: “Don’t put your head under water”
Japanese gymnast runs up $5,000 phone bill playing Pokémon Go game ahead of the Olympics
Vandal spray paints “I’m drunk” on the side of a New Hampshire police station
Dogs left inside a running car, shift it into drive and plowed into a Walmart wall
Maryland idiot breaks into a home, sets fire to a love seat, assaults three people with a knife and hold a Chihuahua hostage – all because his check wouldn’t clear
Iran executes gay teenager in violation of international law
Burglar found in homeowner’s garage tells him “I’m charging my phone”
Homeowner gets tired of constant burglaries, finally catches the burglar, duct-tapes him to a tree, duct-tapes his mouth and nose too – cops show up to find the burglar dead.
Man arrested after a fight over a grilled cheese sandwich
The Russian politician behind its stringent anti-gay laws now wants to decriminalize domestic violence
Non-Spanish speaking teacher sues Miami-Dade after she’s denied a job teaching Spanish
Man burns down $900,000 home to keep it away from his wife
Man found naked in a historic home and drinking Pina Coladas
Man claims he hammered a turtle to death in self-defense
Dog elected Mayor of Cormorant, Minnesota – again
Baseball player’s grand slam home run smashes his own truck windshield
Man accidentally eats pot brownies and calls the family cat a Bitch
Giant poop explosion cause crappy commute in Russia
Late passenger chases his plane on the runway – and catches his flight
Animal rights activist on trial in Canada for giving water to pigs
Pastor who praised Orlando killings charged with child molestation
Intruders entered a sleeping woman’s home and threw potatoes at her
Pennsylvania wife accused of stabbing her husband for drinking her last beer
Dallas schoolteacher innocently names her sixth grade class “The Jighaboos”
Man accidently shoots himself while sitting in a dentist chair
Ten million more American’s smoke marijuana now than 12 years ago
Genius burglar left more than his fingerprints behind in the liquor store he broke into. He also left his T-shirt behind with his name on it.
Florida man with a rifle and dressed as a dinosaur arrested by the police
Man films himself having sex with a McChicken sandwich
Man crashes girlfriend’s car into a building – 8 feet off the ground
A river in arctic Russia has turned blood red
Bakery employee declines to inscribe “Trump 2016” on a birthday cake
A man has spent the last 22 years looking for Bigfoot’s Chinese cousin
German man creates the world’s heaviest bicycle
Teacher installs cycling machines under student’s desks to help them concentrate
Indian cow gets glow in the dark horns
Idaho mother sentenced to prison after multiple citations for breastfeeding in public
Alabama library to enforce jail time for overdue books
You can now do yoga with goats on a farm in Oregon
Man tired of driving to work builds himself an airplane (dude only lived 14 minutes away from his job)
Police say Firefighters called in false alarms for the thrill
Senior policewoman suspended after spat with female colleague over who has the biggest breasts
Man wakes up from a coma and immediately demands Taco Bell food
Student arrested after throwing ketchup packages at a teacher
Man pulls two bags of pot from his underwear in a courtroom
Coast Guard rescues a man running in a bubble in the ocean…..again!
Man attempts to rob a carwash with a potato chip bag
Judge in Iran tells a prisoner; “If you’re innocent you’ll go to heaven after you’re hanged”
Florida mom sees God in her baby’s soiled diaper
Kindergartener suspended for bringing bubble-blowing gun to school
Man hangs on to a helicopter carrying a dead man to his funeral
Woman robbed a bank while babysitting kids
Ottawa homeless shelter helps alcoholics by giving them free booze
KFC launches chicken-flavored nail polish
Taiwanese restaurant charges $300 for a bowl of beef noodle soup
British army investigates video of naked soldiers drinking human waste
Transgender Mafia Don murdered in Naples, Italy
Drug smuggling suspect punched border patrol horse
Drunk man jumps in lion enclosure, attempts to shake hands
Barrister arguing against roll-over bars on quad bike and seeking to dismiss coroner, killed in a quad bike roll-over (?)
Woman with “Stop Domestic Violence” T-shirt arrested for abusing her husband with a gun
Officers find puppy high on Meth, heroin: checks him into rehab
Cincinnati man shits in Lowe’s display toilet
Man who inflated his lips to look like Kim Kardashian has lips reduced – after his face started leaking
Arizona man trades $160,000 diamond for $20 of weed
Man arrested with a gun, marijuana and a box of squirrels
Escaped minimum-security inmate returned with a SUV to pick up his friends
Tied in the heat all day, angry camel bites off his owner’s head
Police arrest a teen for writing about killing a dinosaur (?)
Visit the weird world were grown men enjoy dressing up like dogs
Hi-tech toothbrush allows users to stream a live video from inside their mouths
“Cannibal mother” tried to eat her friend’s face
Canadian couple holds their wedding in front of 1,100 cats
A gym told a woman her breast were too large for her tank top
Door-to-door flasher knocks on Police Chief’s home
Obsessed soccer fan fell so deeply in love with her star she thought he was her boyfriend-and called off her own wedding
Man: “Doctor snipped off my testicle and then lied, saying it had shrunk”
Drunk man crashes his car before a job interview at a taxi company
Man stinks up Athens, Georgia bar with Fart Spray
Man found with crack cocaine hidden under his genitals tells the police it isn’t his
Texas Congressman says US should not make gay space colonies
Pakistani husbands can “lightly beat” their wives, Islamic council says
Texas moron arrested for driving 95 mph says he was driving 115 mph
Burglar knocks over a paint can, leaves a trail of footprints
Massachusetts woman charged with tossing toilet-water soaked bologna sandwich at a court officer
Hungarian weatherman is fired after filling his broadcast with comedy fart noises
4-year-old boy destroys $15,000 Lego sculpture
Donkeys ordered to wear diapers in Kenya’s Wajir town
Woman’s boyfriend burned down 32 apartment builds while trying to cook a squirrel
Stoned sheep high on cannabis go on a psychotic rampage
Parents arrested after running on a restaurant bill and leaving their child behind
Texas student brags on Twitter about being in the US illegally during graduation tweet
Woman tries to strangle herself with her bra during her arrest
Man chops off friend’s penis after losing a penis-measuring competition
Humans confused over a restaurant called Burger & Lobster, which doesn’t have a menu because they only serve….burgers & lobsters
Philippine president-elect urges the public to kill drug dealers
McDonalds heist thwarted by a table full of elite soldiers having lunch
Monkey steals $144 from jewelry store’s cash drawer
Their son was killed – and his parrot is telling people who pulled the trigger
Florida man calls 911 to say he’s out of vodka
Taco Bell employees accused of throwing hot grease on menacing customers
AND OF TO THE WORLD OF THE STUPID……
Woman calls 911 to tell police there isn’t enough cheese on her pizza
Woman accused of hitting a man in the face with frozen meat – alcohol may have been involved
1-armed man accused in pot-fueled samurai sword attack
Naked man exposed his sausage at Waffle House
Poisonous fish with two feet and antlers surprises a man during his walk in the park
Man charged in Ontario after a fight over whether the earth is flat or round
Mentally challenged Michigan police respond to domestic situation, shut down the neighborhood and conduct an 11-hour standoff with an empty house
Fox New Expert: “If we take terrorists gun permits they will kill us with Ford trucks”
Rapper plans to launch his own toilet paper line
India arrest 18 lions and put them on trial to discover which one killed three people
Priest investigated by police after he punched the best man in the face at a wedding ceremony
Fight over farts lead to blows at Sloppy Joe’s
Noah’s Ark crashes into Coast Guard vessel
Rancher on horseback lassoes would be bike bandit in a Wal-Mart parking lot
Murder suspect eludes arrest by ditching prosthetic leg with GPS tracker
Massive fart gets soccer player kicked out of a game
Police swoop in on illegal rubber duck race
Florida man brags about burglary on Facebook, lands him in jail
Sparkler lights bride’s hair on fire at her wedding
Activist shoves two live bats into his mouth
Woman calls 911 to report she’s being held hostage by her cat
Texas mom wakes up from surgery with a British accent
Intelligent robot that remembers and learns could be scrapped after escaping a lab for the second time
Man cuts off neighbor’s head because he stole beer from his home
Man who passed away 3 years ago returns home and kneels before his own grave
Man marries his Smartphone in Las Vegas
Chinese teenager found with rotting feet after 6-day gaming binge
Dunkin´ Donuts manager drops a tray of donuts on the floor, puts them out for sale anyway
Porn website promises to donate to charity when viewers masturbate
Creepy Men in Black reported wandering on rural highways in Iowa
Local woman escorted off premises after her so-called gun turned out to be a yoga mat
World’s fattest child weighs 192Kg – at just 10 years of age
German company creates the world’s first vegan wooden sneakers
World’s oldest Twinkie turns 40, still refuses to decompose
Deer wanders into Wisconsin grocery store, hightails it straight to the liquor section
Prisoner strangles fellow inmate because he looked like Santa Claus
Dead cat taken to the animal shelter turned out to be a hand puppet
Woman severely beats home intruder with his own baseball bat
Cat turns on the faucet and floods a shelter
Scorned woman strips her husband’s alleged mistress in public
Israeli man files a restraining order against God
Baby born with 31 fingers and toes in China
Man shoots up bathroom when occupant takes too long
A man from Florida tries to steal a python by stuffing it down his pants
STD testing company removes Sesame Street advertisements following lawsuit threats
Bakersfield police car rear ends another police car, causing a chain reaction, ultimately resulting in 4 damaged police cars
Most male Germans will be drunk today for no particular reason (ain’t that the truth)
Senior Egypt Official blames “Tom and Jerry” video games for violence across the Middle East
Australian brewery makes beer from belly button lint
Man builds a house with a hole in the floor over a lake so he can fish everyday
Man charged after cops help find his lost marijuana in his backyard
Man arrested after training his dog to do Nazi salutes in a video
Priest accused of sex abuse finds work at teen pregnancy center
Indian woman in her 70’s gives birth to a healthy baby boy
NFL star’s wife gives birth to his 11th and 12th child, despite the fact that he underwent a vasectomy
Drunk toddler found near passed out dad
Ivy League economist suspected of terrorism while doing math aboard an American Airline plane
Family wakes to find a bear stealing candy in their kitchen
Ex-wrestler stopped for drunk-driving takes down seven police officers trying to arrest him
Lawyer eats incriminating evidence to clear his client
Alabama man stole $200,000 in quarters
Anthony Stallard fined for pretending to be a ghost in a cemetery in Portsmouth
Naked woman dancing atop of a truck cab slows traffic in Houston
Indian Army applicants take exam in underwear to prevent cheating
Brazilian man hides in a gas tank to try to get into the U.S.
To prevent sign thefts, town might rename Katie Crotch Road
Elevator crew improperly cuts power, finds woman’s corpse a month later
Florida parents arrested after allegedly using a stun gun to discipline children
Burglar insists he broke into a home to save his wife, Taylor Swift
“Captain America” wanted in beauty store burglary
Germany catches woman smuggling cocaine in breast implants
An eight-year-old was abandoned by his mother in a hospital with a note saying he was rude
Homeland Security finds homework inside suspicious backpack
Coffee shop accused of naked waitresses serving customers
Drunk man knocks himself unconscious after a fight with a wall
Mom arrested after 3-year-old tells cops “she needs a beer”
A golfer shot and killed a dog for stealing his ball
A zoo waited three weeks before alerting the public that 3 leopards were loose
A judge rips a defendant who logged into a court zoom session with his Buttfucker 3000 username
Dracula’s castle in Romania is offering free COVID vaccines to tourists
An Italian woman was accidentally given six shots of a COVID vaccine
Germany wants to ban wearing a yellow star to protest the pandemic lockdowns
Indian doctors warn against using cow dung as a cure for COVID
Russia is going to try and clone an army of 3,000-year-old Scythian warriors
A Tik Toker confronted her cheating husband and his girlfriend at an airport – and she brought the girlfriend’s husband
Teen couple charged with trying to kill her father with meat tenderizer
Texas GOP passes a Bill to stop teachers from talking about racism
Vodka made with apples grown near Chernobyl was seized in the Ukraine
An angry elephant kicked a guy like a soccer ball
A mom goes viral on Tik Tok for shaving her legs with sandpaper
A man allegedly killed a homeless person as practice for his wife’s murder
A woman allegedly used bear spray to abduct an infant of a mom she met on Facebook
A former New Jersey camp worker pleads guilty to child porn charges – again
A lightning bolt sent a big chunk of a highway through a truck’s windshield
Susan and Joe about this one.
A woman said her $26M California lottery ticket was destroyed in the wash
A Pastor turned Only Fans stripper says sex work has made her a better mom compared to her toxic church childhood
Pigs can breathe oxygen via their rectum – so humans probably can too
A San Diego woman was killed when a man leaping to his death landed on her
Oklahoma governor grills steaks under a pro/vegan PETA billboard
California cops deliver Mother’s Day flowers after the delivery driver was arrested for a DUI
Chinese student will go to prison for hacking over $40,000 worth of KFC chicken
An Australian woman wakes up with an Irish accent after throat surgery
Comedian Gary Owen’s estranged wife wants $44k a month in support
Mary Carey says she’s running for the Governorship of California – she’s campaigning in strip clubs
A husband charged with the murder of his wife in Colorado is also charged with voter fraud for filling out her ballot
Tyson meat company blames under-performing roosters for the U.S. chicken shortage
A man in Alaska survives an encounter with a brown bear that bit his head
A Florida woman was arrested for attacking her roommate for loudly playing Chic’s “Le Freak” on repeat
The police in Belgium are looking for a man who had a rocket launcher and threatened the country’s top virologist
A man has the wrong leg amputated in a tragic hospital mix-up
A Japanese bullet train driver took a bathroom break while the train was cruising at 90 mph
A golfer hits a rare hole-in one into a trash can
12 fully vaccinated people died of COVID in L.A. county, showing shots work “extraordinarily well” – health officials say
A Burlington, Vermont man was tased by the police after rushing to help his fiancée in labor
Florida counties with a high Trump support have low vaccination rates
BLM activists said a man tried to hit them with his car….the suspect turned out to be a judge
Florida woman allegedly crashes a children’s party and raped a teenager
Belgian Ambassador’s wife claims diplomatic immunity after slapping a Seoul store assistant
North Carolina senate approves a rise of minimum marriage age to 16
A Pastor claiming to be a descendant of Robert E. Lee isn’t actually related
A Florida gator chased people through a Wendy’s restaurant parking lot
A woman faked her own wedding to get back at her ex-boyfriend
A New Jersey cop was busted for running a meth lab out of his home
Florida Commissioner says, “We made sure” teacher who hung BLM flags was fired
A woman found her friend dead, so she stole her debit car to by some McDonald’s and lottery tickets
A woman was arrested in North Carolina with enough fentanyl to kill one million people
Kim Kardashian tested positive for COVID-19 days after returning from her controversial island birthday party
A mom was arrested after asking the cops what to do with her son’s rotting corpse
Atlanta councilman Antonio Brown, who voted to defund the police had his car stolen
A prisoner beheaded his cellmate, and the guards didn’t even notice
A Michigan woman received a $385 dollar ticket for talking too loud on her phone
Some men who are reluctant to receive the COVID vaccine will happily receive one at a strip club
Men were busted for stealing $740K worth of church donations
Darth Vader’s house in Houston, Texas is on the market for $4.3 million
A salon customer found a dead body in a tanning bed
Italian artist unveils murals of Kim Kardashian and Marge Simpson menstruating
Federal agents busted nine Department of Corrections officers for smuggling drugs and weapons into NYC jails
Willian Shakespeare, the first United Kingdom man to receive the COVID vaccine is dead at age 81
A man used a gun to protect his pet duck from the neighbor’s dog
Notoriously abusive cop in Florida is fired for the seventh time
A “Karen” tells a Burger King worker her uniform is a distraction to her husband
Trump shut down his blog after one month because so many people were making fun of it
A lawyer for Derek Chauvin asked a judge to sentence him to probation – saying cops have a shorter life expectancy in prison
The FDA says not to eat cicadas if you have a seafood allergy
A bride collapsed and died at her wedding – so the groom then married the woman’s sister while her dead body was lying in the next room
An ex-Olive Garden Restaurant worker is urging people to eat somewhere else
Organizers cut off a veteran’s mic when he started talking about black history on Memorial Day
West Virginia is giving away free guns, trucks and cash as prizes for getting vaccinated
Two Florida children, age 14 and 12, ran away, stole guns and fired on deputies during a shootout
A Florida man claims “stand your ground” as a defense for shooting an iguana
29 inmates have broken out of a federal prison over the past 18 months and nearly half are still at large
A man was charged with making terrorist threats because he wanted a day off from work
A North Carolina woman was arrested with 150,000 doses of heroin
A sex-ed teacher was fired for teaching a masturbation class to first graders
A ransom note demands a cheesecake in exchange for the garden gnome’s freedom
A worker allegedly stole 528 blank COVID vaccine cards from a vaccination site
A man high on meth invaded a retired firefighters home wearing a red cape
Forest Service warns hikers about bears stealing backpacks on North Carolina trails
Right-to-carry guns in more churches gets final legislative ok in North Carolina
Staff arrested for not giving the police free hamburgers
German soldiers are recalled from Lithuania over a Hitler birthday song
A small Florida town just sold their water tower for $55,000
Thousands of people are calling for Jeff Bezos to be denied re-entry to earth after his space launch
A man was accused of trying to sell a car with his girlfriend’s corpse inside
Spanish cannibal who ate his mother’s remains with his dog gets 15 years in prison
Drug dealer tosses weed from a Brooklyn rooftop and causes a free-for-all on the street below
In a secret recording, a Florida Republican threatens to hire a Russian-Ukrainian hit squad to take out a rival
Biden nominee called for population control to protect the environment – “We must breed fewer consuming humans”
A man dressed as Superman gets hit by a bus while pretending to stop it
A fan holding a cardboard sign causes one of the Tour de France’s worst pileups
Pope Francis shakes hands with Spider-Man
A 76-year-old woman was sent back to prison for not answering her phone during class
Philippine president Duterte threatens to jail people who refuse a COVID-19 vaccine
A man leaps from a moving plane after trying to break into the cockpit
A woman cut off her boss’s penis after he allegedly tried to rape her
A female driver says gas pumps are sexist because they’re designed for men and hurt her small hands
A Trans woman who sued salon workers for refusing to wax her balls loses her court case
Russia says citizens can decline its vaccine, but the people are saying they have no choice
A father tricked an ex-NRA head into addressing 3,044 empty chairs for gun violence victims
A woman throws a drink at a McDonald’s security guard and gets beat up
Nude sunbathers running from a deer were fined for violating lockdown protocol.
A threatened toad’s hallucinogenic secretions are in high demand
A Mississippi chicken plant held a job fair to replace workers snatched up by ICE
A Minnesota woman drove an SUV through her ex-boyfriend’s burial service
Chris Brown’s massive birthday party was broken up by the LAPD
An ultra-rich family is offering up to $120,000 a year for a couple to take care of their private island in the Bahamas
Ohio Senator was caught zooming and driving
Nearly 1 in 3 new stores in the U.S. is a Dollar Store
A California bar owner was charged with multiple felonies for allegedly selling fake COVID-19 vaccination cards
Indonesia airport scammers reused COVID nasal swab tests on passengers
A Thai court ruled a minister can keep his job despite alleged heroin trafficking link
A Japanese town spent their COVID relief funds on building a statue of a giant squid
Putin says the Russian vaccine is as reliable as an AK-47
Bare knuckle fight nights take off online in Russia
Prince Philip cause of death – he was really old
A Florida man proposes using a ring he stole from his former lover
Tokyo’s Olympic chief resigned after saying women talk too much during meetings
Cockroaches and other obnoxious Valentine Day gifts for your ex are available online
U.S.-UK Brexit trade deal could fill supermarkets with cancer-risk bacon
Arizona legislator compares transgender people to farm animals
Gwyneth Paltrow say “V” stands for vibrator – Happy Valentine’s Day
Virginia college forfeits a basketball game after suspending players for kneeling during the anthem
Tennessee lawmakers introduce a bill to allow fathers to veto abortions
Pigs can be trained to play video games with their snouts
A walrus fell asleep on an iceberg and woke up in Ireland
Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez are giving love another chance after a brief split
Four people were shot dead after an argument over a stimulus check
Republican Marjorie Taylor Greene calls Guam, a U.S. territory a foreign country
Russian hockey player dies after being hit in the head with a puck
A black businesswoman said a bank teller refused her withdrawal because she didn’t feel “comfortable” giving it to her
A museum removed a wax statue of Trump because people kept punching it
12 REICH-publicans voted against honoring the capitol police for protecting Congress
A man from New York sells his fart for $85 dollars
AND OFF TO THE WORLD OF THE STUPID…..
A North Carolina Pastor said; “People are leaving the church – because of churches
A Kansas woman was arrested over an April Fool’s joke calling her daughter and telling her she had been shot
A young couple mistakenly vandalizes a $500,000 painting in South Korea
An ex-Salt Lake City “officer of the year” has been arrested for his role during the capitol riots
A Burger King enraged woman shoots at the workers because her drive-thru order was taking too long
Office buildings are opening back up – not all employees want to return
Scientists have just discovered a dinosaur so massive it’s literally named “The one who causes fear”
The sperms kings have a problem – too much demand
A Danish broadcaster defends a kid show about a man with a superhuman penis
Trump supporters yell “traitor” at Sen. Lindsey Graham at the airport
The world’s unluckiest burglars were arrested after pocket dialing the police during a robbery
Chicago police union president says that the riots are considered treason is beyond ridiculous
Gwyneth Paltrow’s vagina candle reportedly exploded and started an inferno in a woman’s living room
A chef was arrested after designing images of sexually suggestive cakes at an exclusive Egyptian club
Marjorie Taylor Greene files articles of impeachment against Biden for crimes committed by Trump
A Thai woman was sentenced to 43 years in prison for insulting the monarchy
A Scottish petition is circulating around to rename the airport near Trump’s golf course to “Biden International”
A former TSA agent was convicted for tricking women into showing their breast at LAX airport
A Boy Scout was unaware that the old woman he was helping across the street was Alice Cooper
The U.S. Supreme Court has run out of excuses to avoid controversial issues
A McDonald’s customer calls the police because she missed breakfast due to the long drive-thru line
A lawyer gets stuck in Cat Filter Mode during a zoom trial
A New York resident died on Sunday morning shortly after receiving the COVID vaccine, and health officials maintain that “the vaccine is safe”
A man turned his deceased uncle’s skeleton into a fully functioning guitar
One of Trump’s impeachment lawyers sued him last year – and accused him of making claims about fraud with no evidence
Strippers ordered by a dead man gives his coffin a lap dance while his grieving relatives watch
Border Patrol agents confiscated nearly 200 pounds of bologna found in a car near the Mexican border
Red dust from the Sahara Desert turned Italian alpine villages orange
German bakery sell syringe filled doughnuts
Bruce Springsteen was arrested at a New Jersey national park on suspicion of drunk driving
A funeral home van with a body inside was stolen in Missouri
Emergency call: “My cat at my bacon!”
Man caught have sex with a bush (A real bush..not with one of the other Bushes)
Tennessee man driving a pickup truck full of rifles and a propane tank asks DC cops for directions to the White House
Man wearing a Priest outfit assaults Transgender
Badger recovering in a shelter after being found drunk on a Polish beach
Air passenger suing for a back injury caused by sitting next to a fat man
Elderly woman wakes up screaming in a funeral home after doctor declares her dead
Columbian model faces death penalty in China for carrying drugs insider her laptop
Man who was wrongfully imprisoned for 17 years shot dead during drug deal
FIFA exhibit to open at America’s national museum of organized crime
Gov. Mary Fallin’s 28-year-old daughter living in travel trailer outside governor’s mansion
Priest performs exorcism from a helicopter to banish evil from Italian town
Man parks his plane in his driveway
Disneyland Paris probed for charging Brits and Germans more than the French
Trying to build a democracy in a hellish village in Russia called Paradise
Woman sues credit reporting firms for declaring her dead
Man faints after slapping his own face to appease girlfriend
John Kline supports bill allowing women to be fired for having sex
Brooklyn high-School students sexually harassed while painting mural about sexual harassment
Woman seeks divorce from ugly husband
Man shoots Armadillo, gets hit in the face by bullet ricochet
Man interrupts marriage proposal to stop restaurant robbery
Burglary suspect found asleep surrounded by chicken and beer
Woman tries to eat crack cocaine in front of drug agents
Pair charged with school hamster theft
Mother is going blind after drinking 28 cans of Red Bull energy drink every day
Man tries to chew off his fingerprints after arrest
Jail guards used snake to torture former inmate
Canadian hacktivists use Donald Trump’s website to praise Jon Stewart
Man upgrades to Windows 10 – it shows his wife his entire porn collection
Escaped Alabama inmate captured at Waffle House
Judge doesn’t regret telling drug offender he’d be doing society a favor if he killed himself
San Francisco residents pay $1,000 a month to live in shipping containers
A woman named Justice is wanted on murder charges
The secret to living to 110 might be Whiskey and Beer
Massachusetts police have given drug dealers an opportunity to turn in their rivals
Texas public school district promotes Christianity with made up Ronald Reagan quote
Ted Cruz’s website accidentally links to a giant ass picture
City appoints two illegal immigrants as Commissioners
Man guzzles stolen wine in bathroom, stuffs Sushi down his pants
Thief makes a run for it after stealing diarrhea pills
Speeding Ontario woman said she wanted to catch the sunset
Bank robber takes free lollipop before fleeing
Judge bans New Jersey woman for life from Walmarts in America
Fake policeman caught using Hollywood actor’s ID
Search continues for Albuquerque’s “Gummy Bear Bandit”
Woman calls police on man who broke into her home, used the toilet and didn’t flush it
Counterfeit popsicle stick gang busted in Turkey
Man sues wife for trauma after seeing her without makeup
German nurse admits to murdering over 100 patients by giving them drug-induced heart attacks, so he could show off to his colleagues
Louisiana elementary school teacher arrested for having wine in her classroom
A killer shown in a Trump ad has been arrested and deported from Arizona
Sex toys were thrown onto the football field during the New England Patriots/ Buffalo Bills Monday Night Game
Napping American Airlines baggage handler was trapped in the cargo hold on a flight to Chicago
At the bottom of the world, a 33-year-old is about to trek across Antarctica alone – a journey no one has survived and he’s bringing just one pair of underwear
A woman earns $100,00 a year by selling her smelly socks
A man moved to a jungle in India to escape his student loan debts
Civil servant who watched porn at work is blamed for infecting a U.S. government network with malware
A 79-year-old beggar in China is ousted as a wealthy grandma who just enjoys begging
A scientist stabbed his colleague who kept telling him the endings of the books he was reading
A woman says she’s engaged to a ghost, had sex with 20 others and people are impressed
A boxer punched his own coach after losing a fight
A man left his house to go to work and then he was trampled by a wild boar
Chinese company forces staff to drink urine and being whipped after failing to reach their sales targets as punishment
Moms brawl at a school bus stop, 1 airlifted to the hospital after being slashed with a broken coffee mug
A man with no pants on falls through a Waffle House ceiling
A couple spent 10k pampering a squirrel
A man flipped his ex-wife’s car with a tractor and held the police off with a crossbow
A guy who said God sends natural disasters to punish gays has his home destroyed by a natural disaster
New York doctor specializing in addiction treatment was arrested for allegedly receiving cocaine and heroin in the mail
A man was caught getting a pedicure from his wife during a flight from Denver
A black bear knocks over a Christmas tree and then rings the doorbell
2 children found buried 2 years apart in a yard. Their father, a Walmart Santa has been arrested
A man said a hunter shot at him because he thought he was Bigfoot
A woman sent 159,000 text messages after a single date and threatened to make sushi out of the man’s kidneys
A landlord takes the trash left behind by a former tenant and heads to their new home with a dumpster and dumped it in front of their door
A woman woke up and found a drunk man cuddling her dog in her home
Shoplifting suspect running from the police ran into a police station
A song sparks a massive 200-person brawl at a Virginia skating rink
Australian man screaming at a spider “why don’t you die?” triggers a full police response
Former nun-in-training is set to make her professional porn debut
A new Saudi Arabia law requires women to be notified if their husbands divorce them
A man marries a computer-generated hologram
Police officer arrests a man for throwing another man off a bridge
German teen sparks a huge fire after blow-drying a mattress
New Jersey man was shot in the back on Sunday and then shot in the butt on Monday
A blind woman was told to get off the bus because guide dogs can’t be black
A man said he was too drunk to run from a crash
The police said a woman was attacked by a dog and then bitten by its owner
A man denied the ownership of syringes retrieved from his rectum
Uproar as Zambian energy drink causes prolonged erection lasting 6 hours
A man accidentally left 2 pounds of marijuana in a Uber and then tried to get it back from the police
A man had 15 cans of beer pumped into his stomach to keep him from dying
A woman wakes up to find out she can’t hear men – but can still hear women
A Nashville woman set a house on fire because she was not invited to the party
Two Vermont police officers accused of drinking beer they confiscated from minors
Jesus was arrested after stealing pizza and soda
Arizona lawmaker wants porn to fund Trump’s border wall
A woman took off her clothes in front of a bank manager in an attempt to secure a loan
Tokyo offers free noodles to commuters who avoid rush hour trains
North Dakota man pleads guilty to stealing a forklift to kill Donald Trump
Anti-gay therapist turns of to be gay
Bangor, Maine woman charged after her infant ingested meth through breast feeding
A Texas man stabbed his nephew’s pet with a steak knife in retaliation for the dog killing his chicken
Police officer allegedly killed his colleague in a game of Russian roulette
A Florida police officer ran over a man and a woman who were lying on the road to watch the eclipse
A man took a Sacramento-Austin flight with 43 pounds on marijuana in his carry-on bag