I NEED TO GET ON MEDICATION….so I can slap stupid people…..and blame it on the side effects
GETTING OLDER IS WILD…..one wrong pillow angle…..and now your neck is applying for disability
THERE’S THAT SAD MOMENT IN LIFE…when you lose a chip in the dip….and you send in a recon chip….and that breaks too
CHRISTMAS RULES….Don’t overspend…..take care of your mental health…..if someone comments on your weight…..eat them
AT ANY POINT…..in your life you can walk away…..fly away….drive away….you can completely change your life in an instant….if you want to
IT IS DANGEROUS…..to be right in matters….where established men are wrong
FORTUNATELY, AFTER LEAVING THE U.S…..AND MOVING TO EUROPE….I HAVE TO SUFFER FROM…..not worrying about credit scores….free universal healthcare….unlimited access to the Schengen Zone….safe, clean, walkable cities….no gun violence….real work-life balance….not waking into political chaos everyday….and actually enjoying life again.
I DON’T KNOW MUCH….but I know this….the older you get…the faster the number of things you’re willing to wait in line for….approaches zero
DON’T SEND TEXTS…..when you’re angry….wait a bit, have a drink, talk to your friends about it….get yourself really wound up….then send it
FOR THE RECORD….I always want the long version….when I ask how are you doing?
TRUE FREEDOM….looks like clean rivers….time to rest….food that doesn’t poison you….and a future that doesn’t feel like a threat
I HAVE SELECTIVE HEARING…..I’m sorry you weren’t selected today….tomorrow isn’t looking good either
IF A WOMAN….is between 36-45….don’t try her….Tupac, Biggie and Dr. Dre raised her.
WHEN I DON’T NEED IT….it’s right there…..when I do need it….it disappears.
FOR ANYBODY ELSE….that’s getting coal for Christmas….maybe we can link up….and get the grill going or something.
ALONE TIME…isn’t lonely….when you’re dancing to the rhythm….of your own music.
I READ….I travel…..I become.
THERE IS NO ELEVATOR IN HEALING….you have to take the stairs
YOU NEVER KNOW….how long your words will stay in someone’s mind….even long after you’ve forgotten you spoke them…..be kind
WHY DOES EVERYONE….force introverts to leave their comfort zone….but no one forces extroverts….to shut up for a while….why?
THE MORE YOU WANDER…..the more you wonder
PLEASE….no matter how we advance technologically…..please don’t abandon the book…..there is nothing in our material world…..more wonderful than a book
AND MY FAVORITE…..
BEING A PARENT….doesn’t make you an expert….it just allows you to better understand your severe shortcomings….on a daily basis…..because your kids just relish in reminding you of them in both large and small ways….as they get older….the shortcomings just get bigger until…..presto, you’re no long a moron but instead transform into a genius….from whom they want all sorts of advice….I’m actually waiting for that last stage to kick in.