TO U.S. AMERICANS: your welfare is not threatened by a balloon…..it is threatened by a ruling class…..that denies you healthcare…..affordable housing…..modern transit…..living wages…..proper voting rights…..a stable climate…..and a decent chance of living past 77…..know your enemy
SHAQUILLE O´NEAL: I can’t end my post with….. “Love Shaq”……because the B-52’s ruined that for me
WHY…..when somebody die…..y’all think they going to a better place?…..so Hell just empty huh?
YES THE FUCK YOU CAN……end of story!
WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN…..I like you…..and I love you…..when you like a flower…..you pluck it…..but when you love a flower…..you water it daily….. (Buddha)
GREAT T-SHIRT: Raising my husband is exhausting
BOSS: Are you busy on your day off?
ME: That entirely depends on the rest of the information……you’re about to give me
I’M ALLOWED…..to make a big deal…..out of things……that felt really big to me
IT’S BETTER TO WALK ALONE…..than with a crowd….going in the wrong direction
ACCORDING TO GENESIS…..we all come form Adam and Eve…..who had 3 sons……think about that…..and take all the time you need
BEING A LITTLE OLDER…..I’m very fortunate to have someone call and check on me every day……he is from India……and is very concerned about my car warranty
YOU CALL IT…..eating 5 boxes of Girl Scout cookies…..I call it supporting young female entrepreneurs…..we are different
THEN I SPRINKLED MAGIC…..all over you lies…..and grew flowers from your bullshit
“IT GIRL” POST: “I am not ugly!”
POST: When you went to the beach……the tide refused to come in
AN 8-YEAR-OLD boy…..was screaming in the store…..because his mother wouldn’t buy him a chocolate bar…..so I bought one…..and ate it in front of him
PEOPLE WHO SAY……they don’t have time for my bullshit…..need to learn how to manage their time better…….wake up an hour earlier
HAVING A CONVERSATION WITH MY GRANDMA WHO HAS ALZHEIMER’S….
ME: It was nice seeing you
GRANDMA: It was nice remembering you
ME: You remember me?
GRANDMA: I don’t remember your name…..but I remember that I love you
CHRISTIANITY….did not become a religion by the quality of its truths…..but by the quality
of its violence
I PUT MY SCALE…..in the bathroom corner…..and that’s where the little liar will stay…..until she apologises
WE’RE ALL IN THE SAME GAME…..just different levels…..dealing with the same hell…..just different devils
DID YOU KNOW……Abubakari II….the mariner prince of Mali traveled to America in 1311…..and traded with indigenous people……he never claimed to discover America…..because he knew it was already there
SOMETIMES…..you need to blast the music so loud…..that you can’t feel a fucking thing
I DON’T HOLD GRUDGES…..I just remember things for a very long time
GETTING OFFENDED….by something on the internet.….is like choosing to step in dog crap…..instead of walking around it
SOCIAL MEDIA…..is training us to compare our lives…..instead of appreciating everything we are…..no wonder why everyone is depressed
WE KNOW THE BIBLICAL FLOOD NEVER OCCURRED…..because there were great civilizations thriving during that time….they kept good records…..and neglected to mention….they were all wiped from the face of the earth…..the Chinese (Neolitic Dynasty)….the Egyptians (Dynasties 4, 5 & 6)…..Mesopotamians (Early Dynastic Period)….Sumerians (Early Dynastics IIIa & IIIb)…..Peruvians (Norte Chico Civilization)…..and many more……we found a continuous line of culture, construction…..art and historical records…..that run through the time Noah’s flood was supposed to have happened
AND MY FAVORITE……
CATHOLIC CHURCH: No meat on Friday’s
FOLKS: Ok, so no eggs for breakfast?
CC: No, eggs are ok
F: But eggs are chickens
CC; Not until they hatch
F: So the thing, isn’t the thing until it’s born?
CC: That’s correct……Um, no wait